Yearly Review

"As you know, the company had a bad year."
"Actually, I didn't know."
"We only promoted 26 people to Vice President."
"So it was a good year. I mean, for them."
"Right. But not for you. You're still stuck in the same dead-end job. And by the way, what is your job?"
"I do all the mindless drudgery that makes the managers look good so they can get promoted to Vice President."
"Right. You're good at that."
"So do I get more money?"
"Of course not. If you want more money, you need to 'think outside the box.' We want everyone to be 'outside the box.'"
"But I work in a cube."
"Yes. And you should think about that."
"What happens if I refuse to think?"
"You might get promoted."
"This is a strange system."
"It's the American way."
"Maybe I'll go stick my head in the microwave."
"Five minutes on high should do it."
"I might need ten."
"Wave that flag."